Showing reviews 1-5 of 10 | Next

1. Kiss Me!

   Posted by Kate Curnock on 10th May 2012

   Kiss Me! is a book with a good heart. It is an enjoyable and easy read whose central message is one which encourages parents to trust their instincts and not allow anyone's views/theories to get in the way of their love of their children. A lot of the book is given over to debunking theories the author does not agree with. I would have preferred less of this and more expansion on the benefits of the theories he does advocate. The book promotes a gentle cooperative style of parenting and would, I think inspire confidence.

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2. Kiss Me!

   Posted by Chrissie Wade, RM BSc Hons Midwifery on 8th May 2012

   Kiss me! is not an easy step by step guide to parenting, but a conceptual approach based on instinctive parental love and biological nurturing. Take away the health advisors and childbirth gurus, all offering ways to help parents to achieve the perfect routine and well- behaved little angels, and bring on Dr Carlos Gonzales. He draws much of his concept from attachment theorist Bowlby and also from his obvious disdain for fascistic and ritualised parenting. I particularly appreciate his empathic explanation of the needs of a child and traditional assumptions of ‘unreasonable behaviour’. What is ethically refreshing is his profound insight from the child’s perspective. The essence of his stance is that if you pick-up and cuddle your kids when they cry, you won’t spoil them. Indulging children with affection will on the other hand satisfy their natural need for emotional and physical parental contact. What he offers is the most natural approach to being a fulfilled guilt-free parent of well-balanced children. This book is not however a panacea for parental bliss. In fact he suggests demand breastfeeding at all times and advocates co-sleeping with your children. The natural demands of some babies would test many parents to the brink of sanity if they were to be available on demand 24-7. What he doesn’t do, is tell us how. This is not a guide, it is a concept. How can we practically incorporate these ideals in to our busy lives? In our modern world, where the combined incomes of both parents are necessary to exist, compromises on family life are inevitable. He criticises many pedagogic theorists of emotional blackmail, but I fear that following his theory may be guilt-tripped too; as parents try hard to give, give and give a little more, and find it just impossibly difficult to be all things to everyone. However I have no doubt that his overall concept is sound. That is, in a perfect world. Time invested in loving, nurturing and embracing your children at every realistic opportunity will be rewarded with loving respectful individuals in the longer term. On the contrary, programme children into submissive behaviour with strict routines and they will cry more and become attention-seeking infants as they search for the love and contact they so desperately crave. Umm, I think we knew that anyway? Much as the title wouldn’t catch my eye on the shelf, I really have to admit, if you are a parent or about to become one, this is a book definitely worth reading. I also believe it is a necessary read for midwives, health visitors and others involved in giving balanced childcare advice.

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3. Kiss me!

   Posted by Jen Tonkin on 15th Apr 2012

   What a fantastic book! It is written in 2 sections, the 1st section looks at babies and toddlers built in behaviours: why the cry when they are put down, why they demand attention, why they don’t sleep through the night and so on. Gonzalez's points really make you think differently about the way that you react and "manage" different situations. He reminds you that a lot of things are built into our baby’s genes and that crying has allowed them to survive and reproduce for thousands and thousands of years. Gonzalez is a great advocate for breastfeeding and co-sleeping with lots of information and statistics on hand for support. The 2nd section tears apart other authors and “guru’s” advice on different areas of parenting, ie. Time out, potty training, routine. This section was really great however it is a book originally written in Spanish and it would be great if it could have included theories from UK guru’s as it would then appeal to a much larger audience I feel. The writing style within this book is great, chatty, opinionated, open and thought provoking. The chapters are short, so easy to read with only short spaces of time available. A fantastic inspiring and empowering book that urges you to go with your gut instinct and not listen to anyone else! Another book to add to any Mum To Be's MUST READ list!

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4. Kiss me! How to raise your children with love

   Posted by Lisa Raynes on 15th Apr 2012

   This has been a fantastic read for me. I have always tried to have the upmost respect for children and am trying to raise my own daughter with love and consideration. This book has both confirmed some of my current views and mothering style but also gave me some food for thought. The author uses clever examples and anecdotes to help you understand how certain child rearing practices can affect a child both in a positive and a negative way.I will definitely be recommending this book onto all my mummy friends, both current and future ones to hopefully steer them towards the more desirable parenting styles described by Carlos and to steer them away from the other "so called child experts" who advise parents on more severe strategies to raise their children.

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5. This book is DIFFERENT!!

   Posted by Jil Manning on 6th Apr 2012

   Thank goodness for Carlos González's book ‘Kiss me!’ It provides a warm and reassuring balance to the outpourings of the sleep-training ‘baby-guru’ ‘leave your baby to cry’ type authors. So many parenting books start out by putting a barrier between parent and child, setting out the problem in terms of a battle between opposing sides, to be won by the cleverer and more persistent warrior. Gonzalez takes his time with analogies, evidence and examples to provide a new kind of understanding of why little children behave as they do. From this new standpoint, parents can understand intellectually and feel with their hearts that a different, sometimes opposite approach is needed. Conditioning and culture have clouded our ability to act instinctively like other mammals. The very reason that our parenting can cause such deep angst is that our culture doesn’t support what our instincts tell us. González hands the power back to instinctive, loving mothering and parenting. This is a book for anyone who feels too judged and restricted by society’s opinion on their parenting to do what their heart is telling them. ’Kiss me!’ won’t tell you what to do, it will set you free to parent from the heart. Be prepared for this book to illuminate areas of your own life where, for one reason or another, you may not have received the loving care a helpless and dependent being deserves. What makes this book unique among the usual run of instruction manuals and step-by-step guides for parenting is its ability to change the reader through understanding and compassion into a person who has permission to wholly love and respect their child in every area of his behaviour.

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Showing reviews 1-5 of 10 | Next

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